V for “Vendetta.”

MY CRAPPY VOLVO BLOG.

It’s got those little Vs on the hubcaps, I thought I should name it Vendetta.

I bought this awesome 1975 Volvo 240 station wagon. It was five hundred dollars, and all it needed to start running properly was a little T.L.C. It was puttering along on half its cylinders just because no one had replaced the plugs and wires in like ever. It's got a hundred-horsepower two-liter four cylinder, Volvo’s famous “B20” engine, which was only used for one year in this car. The very same engine powered the record-holder for most miles put on any one intact car, a 1966 Volvo P1800S from Brookhaven that’s covered more than 2,600,000 miles.

Stop drafting my station wagon . . . DOT INFO.

Since I bought it I've backed into telephone polls, run into dumpsters, and got hit by a Scion at a mini-roundabout. The enormous steel bumpers are completely undamaged.

It was originally white all over, but the paint on the hood was pretty messed up so I decided to cover it up by painting half of the car blue. Now it’s two-tone. I just used rust-o-leum and applied it with a brush. It looks pretty good, I did a great job masking the chrome.

About a month after I bought it, the pipe what connects the exhaust manifold to the muffler broke into two pieces and the car was really loud for a while. I got a new pipe, but it was pretty rusty at one end and there was a holey old muffler spot-welded to it, and I couldn't get it off. Then I discovered that my broken old pipe was pretty well rusted on to my current muffler, I'm not sure the two were ever meant to be seperated. So, I hacksawed the old pipe off my muffler and hacksawed the muffler off the new pipe, and I joined the two with a small length of aluminum tube from this metal supply place near my house, and secured the mess with u-bolts and plumbing fasteners. It’s still loud, but not deafening. I could fill the gaps with bondo or something and make it a little quieter, but I’m lazy.

MY NEW PAINT.

The bottom rusted out of my spare tire well and the tire fell out, so now it’s lashed to the roof. It occurs to me as I write this that I don’t have a tire iron.

Everything’s actually in English, no ambiguous glyphs. I like how the fuel gauge just says TANK. And BRAKE FAIL is worth a lark.

MY PRIMERED STATION WAGON.
MORE PHOTOGRAPHS.

From what I can figure looking at the service journal, the last time the odometer worked was 1999. Unfortunately I can’t figure out its gas mileage because the trip odometer is broken too. I got nervous when the needle dropped from full to half the day I bought it, but the needle hasn’t budged since, probably broken.

Interesting fing: The record for most miles put on one car (2,600,000) belongs to a man in New York state and his 1966 Volvo P1800, inside of which you’ll find the very same Volvo B20 straight-4 that powers this unassuming station wagon.

Black rubber has never been a suitable accent material in my eye, I intend to replace the slats on the grill with chrome ones from an earlier model.

WHO WANTS TO CLING TO THE ROOF RACK NOT IT. Manual says the car can carry up to fifteen hundred pounds, that's like ten people. Most college-age-car-crammers forget that whereas they may be able to fit thirty people in a Volkswagen Squareback, the rear suspension bottoms-out at eight hundred pounds. Think about how much your friends weigh.

In the thirteen hours since I took this picture I smashed the right tail light glass on a sapling, which will now grow up to be one of those bendy trees. Everyone loves bendy trees, children will sit on the trunk it a row and their parents will take pictures. I found a new tail light glass on Craigslist.

The tailgate must have been bashed at some point, black rubber instead of chrome tells me it's from a newer model.

I can’t believe this has been in the glove box for 33 years. It actually starts with the line “Congratulations on your purchase of a Volvo 240.”

This fine automobile speaks for itself.

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